Listless

I'm making lists.

But this is one of those rare times making lists can't make me happy - or, at least, feel comforted.

And it's making me more and more and more ...

Listless.

:::

Ten reasons to look forward to life in Singapore

1. It’s where I was born and raised and therefore home even though it doesn't feel that way anymore, and, actually, never really has.


2. It’s where my family and most of my friends are located as well as mosquitoes and cockroaches, and especially lizards and the various reptiles and amphibians that I'm phobic towards.


3. Cheap food even if it’s carb-intensive which is a no-no since carbs make me put on weight which I won’t be able to lose because the shitty Singaporean weather is a turn-off when it comes to outdoor exercise and that will in turn subject me to a lot of nagging and sniping about my ballooning figure and weight.


4. Little India even though it’s actually less convenient and farther for me to travel from my location in Joo Chiat to Serangoon (and in fact more convenient and nearer for me here in Welly to travel from my location within the City Central to Newtown to Kajal’s), and even though I cannot buy $10 DVDs like I can from Kajal's.


5. Unlimited Wi-Fi access at home.


6. Generally cheaper books, CDs, and movie tickets.


7. The slimmest of possiblities of meeting up with SH.


8. There's a good chance the heat and humidity will kill me, if claustrophobia and the stifling life there won’t.


9. It’s where I’ll be living out the rest of my utterly miserable days.


10. I’d be headed for suicide if I don’t.

*

Things to do in Singapore

• Get back into yoga.


• Join a women-only gym.


• Buy nipple-tape, since most people in Singapore don't appear to have seen nipples before, or even seem to have them.


• Rampant consumerism: add to present collection of DVDs, VCDs, CDs, and books.


• Gorge on mitthai (attention all burfis and laDDus: watch out!).


• Search for fig burfis.


• Participate in RedQuEEn activities.


• Volunteer at Pelangi Pride Center.


• Volunteer at an animal shelter.


• Continue sign-language lessons.


• Enroll for a Hindi language course.


• Enroll for cello or classical guitar lessons.


• Get in touch with old friends.


• Get in touch with new friends.


• Attend Bwie San’s wedding.


• Look forward to attending Andrea’s wedding.


• Feel reluctant about attending Andrea’s wedding because I’m not comfortable with Andrea’s squeeze and I’d be the only one without a partner as Kai will definitely be going with her husband, Robin, who I don’t know well.


• Download music until Singnet sends a warning email.


• Enjoy Daddy’s cooking.


• Put up with only-half-joking warnings about putting on weight every time I eat something I like (which will inevitably be fattening), including Daddy’s cooking.


• Secretly sabotage the television at home so it can only be switched on for three hours a day; failing that, secretly cancel television license and cable subscription: television is evil and life is so much better without it, as I've found out these past three years.


• Feel like an outsider at the annual family gatherings.


• Get insanely irritated with the sister and her boyfriend every time:
     i) she blasts music;
     ii) she brings him home for dinner;
     iii) I come home to an occupied living room with the two of them in it.


• Enroll for a teaching course or find a job.


• Get a UV tattoo ... among other artworks.


• Cry.


• Die.