When You Fall In A Dream
I remember a dream from yesterday morning.
In one of the Sandman books (can't remember which - maybe Fables and Reflections), there is this short story about a man (a playwright, I think) who, on the eve of the opening of his play, freaks out because he is suddenly overwhelmed by self-doubt.
He falls asleep and meets Dream, who helps him with his fear of falling. The concluding line of story goes something like: "When you fall in a dream, sometimes you die, sometimes you wake up, and sometimes you learn to fly."
In my dream, I was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes open. Standing in front of my wardrobe, dressing, I decided to give in to my exhaustion; my eyes closed and I let myself fall backward.
Eyes closed, I kept waiting for the pain to hit me - the pain of my back colliding with my bed-frame and of my butt hitting the floor - but it never came ... because I didn't seem to stop falling.
It was a very, very gentle; I was almost floating, like a feather gliding down to the ground. It seemed to last for ever.
Finally, curiosity drove my eyes open, and I found myself having already fallen. I didn't fall awake, as I did before; I just fell, and kept falling, until I opened my eyes. If I hadn't opened my eyes, I might still be falling.
Like Alice down the rabbit-hole - except I'd never stop falling.
When you fall in a dream, sometimes you don't die, you don't wake up, and you don't learn to fly; sometimes, you just fall forever.
And when you don't stop falling, you stop fearing.
I wish I never opened my eyes.
In one of the Sandman books (can't remember which - maybe Fables and Reflections), there is this short story about a man (a playwright, I think) who, on the eve of the opening of his play, freaks out because he is suddenly overwhelmed by self-doubt.
He falls asleep and meets Dream, who helps him with his fear of falling. The concluding line of story goes something like: "When you fall in a dream, sometimes you die, sometimes you wake up, and sometimes you learn to fly."
In my dream, I was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes open. Standing in front of my wardrobe, dressing, I decided to give in to my exhaustion; my eyes closed and I let myself fall backward.
Eyes closed, I kept waiting for the pain to hit me - the pain of my back colliding with my bed-frame and of my butt hitting the floor - but it never came ... because I didn't seem to stop falling.
It was a very, very gentle; I was almost floating, like a feather gliding down to the ground. It seemed to last for ever.
Finally, curiosity drove my eyes open, and I found myself having already fallen. I didn't fall awake, as I did before; I just fell, and kept falling, until I opened my eyes. If I hadn't opened my eyes, I might still be falling.
Like Alice down the rabbit-hole - except I'd never stop falling.
When you fall in a dream, sometimes you don't die, you don't wake up, and you don't learn to fly; sometimes, you just fall forever.
And when you don't stop falling, you stop fearing.
I wish I never opened my eyes.
posted by s at 11:16
2 Comments:
no no! that line came from Dream's little conversation with a little girl he met in the airplane, while on a search for the prodigal, Destruction, with Delirium!
ok. that was a mouthful.
isn't the little girl more concerned about what is real and what isn't; something like, how she can be sure whether she can really fly (in her dreams) or she's only dreaming she could fly?
gosh, i've got my stories all confused ...
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